It's plane wrong .... Shirley

Northern RBS Airlines cabin crew working in their nose-diving aircraft have complained that the state-owned aircraft sent up to rescue them did not contain enough bonus cushions on their seats.

Northern RBS Airlines planes began losing altitude at an alarming rate from above 160,000 feet last year. Consequently, and in an unprecedented move, RAF Hercules transporter planes were immediately scrambled to rescue them and to avoid crashes into major residential areas of Britain that would have resulted in the biggest loss of peacetime civilian life since the 1930s.

One pilot purred "we've been working really hard sitting at the controls at all hours pushing the plane to fly higher and higher. For the government to take away our bonus cushions and making us sit on just normal seats is just scandalous."

To address this issue Prime Minister Gordon Brown is now introducing legislation banning airlines from attempting to fly aircraft beyond the earth's atmosphere (where there's no gases or oxygen of any kind,... altogether!)

Pure genius....